How To Save Private Ryan

Honoring the Greatest Generation, healing the Weakest Generation (Millennials), and rescuing Zoomer Private Ryans

Comrades: Today we honor the brave men who stormed the beaches of Normandy 78 years ago.

Saving Private Ryan is one of the greatest war movies ever made. I have watched it several times and it hits harder every time. Those brave men did not make the ultimate sacrifice so we could live like this. If they saw the current state of affairs, they probably would have turned back.

Today I will explore the parallels between the physical war endured by the Greatest Generation and the psychological/chemical war endured by the millennials. We are weak compared to them and owe them a great debt of gratitude, but have faced a silent war that we are still trying to fully grasp. All of us must save ourselves and the Zoomers from this ongoing war. Here is how I see each famous scene of Saving Private Ryan through the lens of modern ailments.

Scene 1: Omaha Beach

I get queasy just walking around in Karenland and seeing what it stands for. Many millennials never made it onto the beach, as several million were aborted. The ones who did have been cut down by bullets of every malaise for decades (WEF Waffen SS Division machine gunners in parentheses):

• Obesity (Big Food, Big Media)

• Deep Soy/GMO (Big Food)

• Depression/anxiety (Big Pharma, Big Tech)

• Leftist/trans indoctrination/grooming, degeneracy, Godlessness (Government, Woke Industrial Complex)

• Student debt and underemployment (Government, Woke Industrial Complex)

• Global Financial Crisis (Wall Street) - Litquidity made a Saving Private Ryan video meme of the current carnage here

• Hyperinflation (Federal Reserve, Government)

• Alcoholism (Big Food)

• Marijuana (Drug Cartels)

• Opioids (Big Pharma, CCP, Drug Cartels)

• Gambling and sportsball worship (Big Media, Big Tech)

• COVID hysteria (Government, CCP, Big Pharma, Big Media, Big Tech)

• Social media solipsism and addiction (Big Tech, CCP TikTok)

• Pet “parenthood”, DINK lifestyle, Extinction Rebellion (Big Media)

• Pill/Carousel/Wall for spinsters (Big Pharma, Big Media)

• Adderall/Porn/Gaming for incels (Big Pharma, Big Tech)

• Real war casualties/PTSD from in Iraq/Afghanistan (Government, Military Industrial Complex)

All of these weapons grew to industrial scale as millennials came of age. Every millennial has been hit by several of these bullets, including yours truly. When I look around at how few millennials are well adjusted and have been able to start a family by their 30s, I feel like Captain Miller surveying the carnage: “This is all? This is all that’s made it!? Not enough, this is not enough.” A soldier screams to him: “They're killing us! We don't have a fucking chance, and that ain't fair!”

Scene 2: The Sniper

No good deed goes unpunished. While trying to calm a crying girl, Private Caparzo exposes himself to fatal sniper fire. Parents protesting school boards now take fire from their own government, which labels them domestic terrorists. In Loudon County, a father was arrested for confronting the school board about covering up the sexual assault of his daughter by a trans student. The Biden administration has tethered federal school lunch funding to compliance with gender identity ideology. Attorney General Merrick Garland’s son in law runs Panorama, a data harvesting company deployed by many school districts. Like Sergeant Jackson, we must neutralize those who lurk in the rubble of their crumbling institutions seeking to harm children and ambush parents.

Scene 3: The POW

Captain Miller’s squad loses Medic Wade to a mortal wound while taking out a German machine gun nest. One of the Germans surrenders and the group is torn about what to do with him. Painfully, they show mercy and let him go. Reiben predicted that he would get picked up by his own Wermacht, foreshadowing that the same POW would end up killing Captain Miller and Private Mellish. The modern day equivalent is when someone who defends “Minor Attracted Persons” (Allyn Walker) was fired by Old Dominion University, but then hired by Johns Hopkins at its Moore Center for Prevention of Child Abuse. JHU has lost its mind and through this decision will cause harm to children down the line, just like they did with Professor John Money.

Scene 4: The calm before the storm

Private Ryan’s story about the last night he spent with his brothers was Matt Damon’s finest acting, a true tearjerker monologue. Anyone can relate to the simple joys and inside jokes of home. Millennials are the last generation that grew up without smartphones and high speed internet, making us a unique inflection point in human history. I have fond memories of running around in the neighborhood knocking on friends’ doors. Spontaneous play is now rare in the era of over scheduling helicopter parenting and COVID isolation. Gen Z doesn’t even know what they missed.

Scene 5: Hand to Hand Combat

During the final battle, Private Mellish engages in brutal hand to hand combat with the same German soldier that was released in Scene 3. It is one of the most excruciating sequences ever filmed. Minutes felt like hours as they struggled to kill or be killed, dripping sweat and blood onto each other. The entire time this is going on, Private Upham is cowering around the corner too scared to help. If he had intervened, they would have easily won the fight. Sadly, Upham’s cowardice costs his comrade’s life. This sequence is akin to the cancel culture mob. They isolate and destroy their targets because others are too scared to help.

Scene 6: The Last Stand

This is where we are now. The WEF Panzers are rumbling towards us. Government, NGOs, media, academia, big tech, and corporations are marching in lock step under woke leftist command. Like Captain Miller, we appear to be hopelessly outgunned firing memes at their steamrolling tanks. It feels like June 4, 1989 all over again. Now is the time for all of us to stand up against this tyranny. We cannot hide in fear like Upham.

Scene 7: Earn this

The white pill is that we can turn the tide for our children and grandchildren. All generations are on the Normandy beaches together; we need the steel and courage that the men of D-Day had. Let us mentor Gen Z so that they avoid the fate of the Millennials. Hopefully we can all grow old and build strong families like Private Ryan did.

My dear Mrs Ryan: It's with the most profound sense of joy that I write to inform you your son, Private James Ryan, is well and, at this very moment, on his way home from European battlefields. Reports from the front indicate James did his duty in combat with great courage and steadfast dedication, even after he was informed of the tragic loss your family has suffered in this great campaign to rid the world of tyranny and oppression. I take great pleasure in joining the Secretary of War, the men and women of the U.S. Army, and the citizens of a grateful nation in wishing you good health and many years of happiness with James at your side. Nothing, not even the safe return of a beloved son, can compensate you, or the thousands of other American families, who have suffered great loss in this tragic war. I might share with you some words which have sustained me through long, dark nights of peril, loss, and heartache. And I quote: "I pray that our Heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the alter of freedom." -Abraham Lincoln. Yours very sincerely and respectfully, George C. Marshall, General, Chief of Staff.

May God bless our veterans and their families. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find some tissues to deal with these terrible allergies…