How To Win The Apprentice (Part 2)
A dozen Donald clips from a show full of fun insights on our culture and how he operates
Comrades: Donald Trump didn’t change, but the world did.
In 2004, The Apprentice raised Trump’s profile from real estate mogul to media mega-celebrity. In every episode, two teams compete on various business challenges. The winning team receives a reward, while losing team must head to the infamous boardroom. After moderating heated debates and receiving insights from two of his executives who have observed the teams' performances, Trump dismisses one contestant with his famous phrase:
The Apprentice is as much a reflection on our society as Trump. It is a time capsule to an era where you could just say things and do things in America. Bantering, comedic timing, and instinctual decision-making is an art form. POTUS talks to world leaders the same way he talked to Apprentice candidates, which has forever changed diplomacy. When it’s all said and done, he will have generated more timeless content than anyone in history. World peace would be a nice bonus after this stellar week.
The showman was at his best in these 12 moments - which one is your favorite?
Trump warns an all-women team that they are relying too much on sex appeal to win.
The world was never the same after he explained a new technology called the text message - “What the hell do I know about text messaging?”
Trump fires a contestant for calling himself white trash - “You think I want to hire somebody that’s white trash?”
As he would later do decades later with Sleepy Joe, Trump blasts a contestant for reading from a teleprompter - “He couldn’t f***ing read!”:
When a father of 5 develops a man-crush on a male model, Trump asks if he’s gay and assures it’s ok if he is.
Trump recognizes the power of the LA Times and the mainstream media - “whenever they write a bad story about me, I go through hell.”:
After a team complains that too many Spanish-speaking Latinos couldn’t understand their English instructions, Trump suggests they should have used their eyes and adapted to the demographics even if it’s not politically correct.
Trump fires a contestant on the spot after he catches him cheating by texting friends to help win a challenge, reading it out loud in front of everyone:
A contestant strokes The Donald’s ego by describing his brand’s attributes as wealth, power, and sexual prowess:
Another drops the mic by stating she likes older men and eventually wins that season:
Born on Flag Day, Trump criticizes a contestant for losing track of the American flag:
Kim Kardashian makes a cameo on her way to becoming one of the world’s biggest “influencers”:
Shitpoasting is the new freestyle rap battle and no one has been better prepared to drop bangers daily:
For more on The Apprentice:
The Administration: Season 2
Comrades: The sequel of The Administration is better than the original.
Posters are in control - give the White House social media team a raise:
Meanwhile, in Trump’s hometown:
Thank you, Yuri! These are awesome. I had never watched The Apprentice.
Now that the Soviet Union is long gone and Americans have lost their foil, they have forgotten what they stand for. It may be necessary to see the failure and devastation that results from those ideas closer to home. Maybe in the long run, losing these places to communism 2.0 will remind the rest of the country why it's so important to avoid that religion of envy.