Comrades: Counter-revolutionary rightist Jordan Peterson has been sentenced to reeducation by the CCP (Canadian Communist Party). Hope this video get censored. Share with all comrades in the true north strong and free!
TWITTER VERSION: https://twitter.com/yuribezmenov22/status/1785996868222058627
Special shout out to my fellow Soviet anon collaborator, Dead Lenin. He is based in Canada and hoping to free his country from the Commies. Check out his work at www.deadlenin.com and on Instagram @deadleninstaydead.
Original script juxtaposed with reimagined script:
[SIGN ON STAGE: College of Psychologists of Ontario]
Rebellion is just! Revolution is righteous!
Protect our Democracy from the unacceptable fringe minority! Get boosted, stay safe! Honk Honk is code for Heil Hitler! End fossil fuels! Burn down churches! Land back! Trans women are women!
Father…
Father…
Ye Zhetai. Aren't you a professor of physics?
Jordan Peterson. Aren’t you a professor of psychology at University of Toronto, eh?
You should know. You were my student.
I was for 20 years until I resigned due to woke idiocy.
Behave yourself!
Hate speech!
Ye Zhetai. In your physics course, did you teach the theory of relativity?
Jordan Peterson. Will you address us using our preferred pronouns?
Relativity is one of the fundamental theories of physics. How can a basic survey course not teach it?
No because I am against tyrannical compelled speech, bucko. Have you made your bed?
You lie! Einstein went to the American Imperialists and helped them build the atomic bomb!
Fascist! If you do not apologize and complete a reeducation course, you will lose your license!
Bring up his wife. She is a genuine physicist. She knows the truth!
Bring up Cathy Newman (she/her). She is an expert truth-teller who understands the harms of free speech!
Ye Zhetai! With the help of the revolutionary youth, it has become clear to me. I want to stand on the side of the people!
Jordan Peterson. With the help of the LGBTQIA2S+ trans youth, it has become clear to me. I stand on the side of the two-spirit furries!
Bow your head, Ye Zhetai. Bow your head. Bow!
Freeze his bank accounts! Bow to Chrystia Freeland!
Ye Zhetai. You cannot deny you lectured on the counterrevolutionary Big Bang theory.
Jordan Peterson. So what you’re saying is, you lectured on the counterrevolutionary idea of setting your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.
It is the most plausible explanation for the origin of the universe.
That was one of my 12 Rules for Life. Rule #6.
Lies! The theory claims to know when time began.
Lies! Criminalizing deadnaming and misgendering will lead to utopia.
Time began? What came before time?
Deadnaming? What is Ellen Page’s gender?
It leaves open a place to be filled by God.
Elliot Page is a stunning and brave he/them.
Are you suggesting God exists?
Are you suggesting Castro is Trudeau’s father?
Science has given no evidence either way.
No, but their philosophies and appearances are remarkably similar.
Down with Ye Zhetai! Down with academic authorities!
Down with Jordan Peterson! Down with Christofascist white supremacists!
Down with academic authorities! Rebellion is just! Revolution is righteous!
Protect our Democracy from the unacceptable fringe minority! Get boosted, stay safe! Honk Honk is code for Heil Hitler! End fossil fuels! Burn down churches! Land back! Trans women are women!
***Comrade Peterson’s ESG score has fallen to 0, so he will be trampled by RCMP horses and generously given MAID.
If you enjoyed this one, the previous two episodes can be found in the Video section and below:
How To Make a Struggle Session Parody (Part 3) - Jordan Peterson (3 min)