How To Celebrate Lunar New Year (INTERACTIVE PODCAST + POLLS)
BONUS POST: A podcast with rooftop friend K about modern fatherhood and presenting the first ever boba/rooftop of the year awards - CAST YOUR VOTES NOW!
Comrades: Happy Year of the Rabbit! This bonus post is my red envelope gift to you. Hope it gets your weekend off to a fun start.
I am thrilled to host my rooftop Korean friend K for another podcast. Lunar New Year is a special time for Asian families, so we will focus on those 2 topics today. Our previous conversation can be found at How To Rooftop. For more background on what we will be bantering about, I recommend reading How To Stop Asian Hate and How To Make Fatherhood Great Again.
We will attempt a new twist on the traditional podcast format. Instead of looking things up as we go like Joe Rogan and Tim Dillon, I have posted the exhibits we will be discussing below. Scroll down as you listen along: the first 20 minutes will cover our perspectives as new dads, the next 10 minutes on the concept of boba Asians, and the last 10 minutes will feature the boba/rooftop of the year awards.
As with my other podcasts and the more spicy/revealing posts, I have put the audio behind a paywall. It’s well worth the price of admission - I almost spit out my tea a few times in laughter.
***ALL READERS CAN VOTE IN THE POLLS BELOW - DISCLAIMER: I do not believe in collective guilt. There are good and not so good people of every race and religion. K and I are especially critical of our own. #stopasianhate is an insulting leftist propaganda campaign because it assaults reality.
Modern family tragedies and karents:
Boba Asian hive mind cowardice:
Now onto the awards show. There were so many strong boba contenders that we had to split the award into 2 gender categories: Boba Eunuch and Boba Concubine. All of these people have caused more Asian hate than any orange man or China virus could. Based on voting data, bobas outnumber rooftops 2:1. Further down, we honor the rooftop of the year award and rooftop legacy as a posthumous award.
VOTE IN THE POLLS BELOW! DEMOCRACY DIES IN THE DARKNESS!
Boba Eunuch of the Year
Elvis Chan: FBI Agent who coordinated deep state and Big Tech censorship.
Dr. Richard Pan: California State Senator who sponsored legislation mandating COVID jabs for kids to attend school and revoking doctors’ licenses for “misinformation”.
Dr. Dan Chang: pediatric surgeon at Duke who denied a 14-year-old girl a kidney transplant because she didn’t get the jab.
Rep. Ted Lieu: US Congressman who donated $50K of his campaign funds to get his son into Stanford. He also received major donations from serial groomer, murderer, and drug abuser Ed Buck.
Dr. Eric Feigl-Ding: COVID fear porn monger who moved to a country that kept schools open while urging American schools to remain closed
Boba Concubine of the Year
Nika Soon-Shiong: billionaire heiress who pushes a defund the police socialist agenda as Public Safety Commissioner of West Hollywood. Daddy Patrick owns the LA Times.
Dr. Grace Lee: Head of CDC committee on vaccine safety, who runs away when presented with data that goes against the narrative.
Dr. Leana Wen: Former Head of Planned Parenthood and CNN talking head who pushed for child masking and jab mandates. She backpedaled on the masks and said they don’t work after her own child suffered learning loss.
Naomi Osaka: The Zoomer version of Serena Williams. Cashes in on her identity as the highest paid female athlete, but doesn’t have the grit to handle press conferences or rowdy fans.
Eileen Gu: sanpaku-eyed turncoat skier who chose to represent the CCP over the USA in the Winter Olympics for $$$.
Lindy Li: this poor girl just needs to get laid, she Tweets all day about licking Joe’s boots and hating on Republicans. Maybe she should date Hunter. Oh wait, he said NO YELLOW. #STOPASIANHATE
Fang Fang: this honeypot got laid, banged Eric Swalwell, and whispered his pillow talk to her CCP handlers.
***NOTE: Substack has a maximum 5 choices in their polls, so I combined the athletes and honeypots.
Rooftop of the Year
Ai Weiwei: dissident artist who defied the CCP and explained to our bootlicking press how the WEF Wehrmacht is far more authoritarian than Orange Man.
Shanghai Cig Man: no further description required.
Andy Ngo: intrepid reporter who exposed Pantifa and has been attacked by them.
Jonny Kim: Navy SEAL Space Force Astronaut Doctor who is the envy of every Asian Tiger Mom.
Arthur Kwon Lee: warrior artist and friend, highly recommend the podcast we did last summer.
Rooftop Legacy Award (posthumous)
Bruce Lee: the GOAT of martial arts.
Ted Ngoy: based Donut King and Combodian refugee who lived the American dream.
Rocky Aoki: founder of Benihana and all around badass.
Pat Morita: actor who played Mr. Miyagi.
Thuy Trang: yellow power ranger.
*We decided not to nominate Otoya Yamaguchi due to violence.
In Memoriam to the OG Rooftops:
The men in the iconic Rooftop Korean LA 1992 photo both passed away over the past few years:
***The last 2 questions are for paid subscribers because only they have access to the podcasts:
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